Back when I was drinking every night I used to fall asleep straight away. Like literally within 3 minutes of my head hitting the pillow. You know the score – in bed, fidget, pillow adjustment, check alarms are on and phone is plugged in and on silent, another wriggle then….. sleep.
Since I stopped drinking it takes a bit longer. Don’t get me wrong, I am still reasonably good at going to sleep… and I have the the greatest sympathy for people who really properly struggle. But nowadays, it takes me a little while, say 15 or 20 minutes. And during that time I think.
I am trying to use that time for helpful, positive thoughts. Gratitudes. Thinking about what I’ve learnt from books I’m reading or podcasts I’ve listened to. But more often than not, my mind gravitates towards work. This really annoys me! In an ideal world, work would stay at work and my time away from work wouldn’t be invaded by it. For some reason though, I always end up back at work.
It’s not that I don’t like my job, I do! When I’m there. However home is a very different place. I need to compartmentalise otherwise the working takes over. Home is for self care, family, calm. Not for stress, unfinished to do lists, remembering things I forgot to do that day, problem members of staff or issues on projects to deal with.
So really what I’d like to know is – what you think about when you’re trying to fall asleep? I was wondering this the other night – what do other people think about when they’re lying in bed?
Since I’ve embarked on not drinking and self care, this is my routine:
– into bed
– browse instagram (I only follow sober stuff)
– browse facebook (only in sober FB groups anonymously – not looking at the propaganda from ‘friends’!)
– read the WordPress blogs from the lovely people I’ve found and follow
– read my kindle for half an hour or so
– lights off, to…… think.
I know that all of the good advice is to ignore social media and screens but I figure it’s OK if it’s all strictly self-care focused! Hey – we have to bend the rules a little sometimes!
Any pointers would be gratefully received 🙂
In conclusion – it’s all going rather well. I’m sleeping well (when my husband’s not snoring!). I’m not drinking well. My therapy sessions feel positive and useful. I think I’m a calmer more patient mum to my two angels. Oh yeah, and work is going well too…. except I keep sodding thinking about it at bed time!!!