The C-Word

So life has gone a bit mental all of a sudden… and it’s all because of this coronavirus craziness. I mean, who actually thought that one day something like this could really actually come along and turn everything upside down?

I am a person who craves certainty, and predictability. I calm myself with planning and organising and filling in my calendar with activities and holidays. And now it’s all been upended. We were due to go on a once in a lifetime family holiday to Disney Florida in 2 weeks time. (Once because it costs an arm and a leg!!) Family as in 11 of us! My mum and step dad, my 3 brothers, a wife and a girlfriend, and me, my husband and my girls who are exactly the eight age for it at 9 and 11.

But not now. Now I’m looking through the small print of hotels, villa bookings, flights, car hire, airport parking details, all to see of I’ll be able to get it back to maybe go next Easter. While managing my children who have been looking forward to this trip for a year.

In typical rebound-style I’m hastily trying to plan a Plan B trip for the 4 of us in the UK to go some way to making up for the dream holiday we won’t be taking. We’re thinking a lodge in the Lake District, or mid-Wales, with a hot tub at the moment. We can take a stack of board games, bikes and fishing gear and ‘self isolate’ in the woods somewhere.

But who knows if we’ll even be able to do that?

Don’t get me wrong. I know how lucky we are. This all sounds very “woe is me” with my shiney golden slippers. But we are gutted. I know how lucky we are to know that if we do get the the virus, me and mine will probably be fine. And we are fortunate to be able to plan an alternative.

It’s just this uncertainty and not knowing. The schools have closed. For how long? Will we be in lock-down? For how long? Will my Nan be ok (she’s 87)? I have to try and work from home? How long can I even do that for effectively? Are the British government not taking enough precautions like the other European countries seem to think? WHEN WILL IT ALL BE OVER?

It’s a really scary time. My nan said it’s more scary then during the war! She said “we had rationing and all that, but we always went to school”. Bless her.

In a way though, it’s comforting to know that we’re all this together. Not that I would wish this on anyone, but it’s good to know that it is everyone. So everyone understands this struggle. Everyone has to do the right thing. We have to do it as a collective, and there is an amazing solidarity in that.

Stick together, do what it asked of us, and stay safe. Thank god I’m not drinking – or my anxiety would be through the roof!!

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